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Apple

I found a list of 100 activities that men should be capable of doing on a popular blog called The Art of Manliness and decided to add the activities I still need to learn here. I’m surprised how much I don’t know. Of the 100 activities, there are 68 I have never tried before. Here they are:

Hunting.

I have never shot an animal. Although those squirrels and rabbits look pretty tasty. Something about eating what you kill seems like a worthwhile pursuit.

Changing a tire.

I recently had a flat tire and it would’ve been quite handy to know how to put on the spare. Especially if I was out in the middle of nowhere. Instead, I had to depend on the tow truck driver to help me out.

Starting a campfire.

I have always watched others start a campfire. It would be great to take charge for once. This would be especially handy for those delicious marshmallows on a stick.

Chopping wood.

I weakly attempted this once and nearly butchered my leg. It would be ideal to learn the proper wood-chopping technique, especially if I would like to keep my limbs in future.

Change car oil.

Switching the car’s oil seems straight-forward enough. I should definitely learn this.

Fix leaky faucets.

If there is ever a plumbing issue with my sink, I would be hopeless.

Treat poisonous bites.

With all of the wildlife out there on hikes, this is a must-have survival skill.

Treat burns.

Just in case the campfire I attempted to start gets out of hand…

Predict weather.

When looking up, I have no idea how to accurately forecast weather patterns. If I did, then figuring out what to wear would be a lot easier.

Read maps.

With GPS, we forget the importance of good ole traditional map-reading. If technology fails, this is a critical plan B skill.

Read a compass.

Which way is North? Instead of always getting lost, I’d really like to know how to read a compass.

Do a proper deadlift.

I’m not really sure if my form is correct, and that can’t be good for my back.

Recite a poem or joke from memory.

My memory needs an overhaul, because if I can go to a party with a joke or poem in my head, people will love me.

Throw a spiral.

Football-lovers will gasp when they see my attempt at throwing. On the positive side, I have definitely mastered the sloppy throw.

Sew a button.

If my dress shirt falls apart, I currently depend on my mom for all emergency tailoring needs.

Cleanse any water.

Water in the wilderness is filled with bacteria. It would be worthwhile to learn how to clean the water to make it drinkable.

Be bear aware.

I know there are different types of bears, but no understanding of how to handle each one. And I’d rather not be turned into a tasty meal.

Break down doors.

I feel like the door would break me if I attempted this right now.

Sharpen knives.

A dull knife is more dangerous than a sharp one, people say.

Give a compelling speech.

Aside from the standard boring speeches given at business meetings, knowing how to deliver material passionately would be better.

Unclog toilets.

I know there is a plunger, but I have never used one before. Thankfully?

Treat frostbite.

If I ever get into mountainous terrain, understanding the dangers of the cold would be advantageous.

Build shelter.

In case I find myself stranded, I should know how to build a makeshift home.

Grow my own food.

I think there are ways to grow vegetables, even from a simple vase. I definitely need to learn this.

Make small talk.

As an introvert, I am terrible at small talk. But in order to build relationships, simple conversations are crucial.

Identify safe plants.

I definitely wouldn’t want to eat the poisonous ones, eek.

Properly pour beer.

Not that I drink beer, but this would be a pretty neat skill to show off and talk about at a party.

Learn the fireman’s carry.

If my apartment building ever catches on fire, knowing how to save lives would be valuable.

Open a bottle without the bottle opener.

Once again, a cool party trick to show off.

Cast a fishing line.

I haven’t touched a fishing pole since I was a child. I don’t think I’ve ever fished in my life.

Know a foreign language.

I vaguely remember French, but really knowing a language would be ideal.

Ask women out in-person.

This online dating world limits my chances at finding the one. Having the confidence to ask women out in-person would be better.

Know North.

As a follow-up to the compass skill, I couldn’t tell you which way is North right now.

Fell a tree.

This sounds scary, but I should probably learn about it.

Hitch and back up a trailer.

With all the family camping under my belt, you’d think I’d know how to handle a trailer by now? Nope.

Learn a knockout punch.

In case I see some bullies in the streets…

Make pancakes from scratch.

I barely even know how to use Aunt Jemima.

Skipper a boat.

What does skipper mean? I have no idea how to handle or assist with a boat.

Dress for any occasion.

I’ve been into t-shirts and shorts these days. Maybe I should up my wardrobe game.

Shoot a bow and arrow.

This would be fun for bowhunting and archery. Sadly, I think I’ve only ever touched a bow once, and that was years ago.

Drive stick.

Automatic privileges over here. My first car was automatic and haven’t had the chance to learn manual gears.

Pick a lock.

Just in case someone locks me in a room…

Learn to dress wild game.

Once I kill an animal, how do I handle it? Something to know.

Play a song by guitar.

Other than using Garageband on my phone, playing the guitar properly is something I have tried and failed at.

Use a chainsaw properly.

Similar to wood-chopping, I wouldn’t want to lose a limb on my next attempt.

Squat properly.

Squats are great for leg strength. Unfortunately I have never been trained on proper form (probably why I always avoid doing these).

Whistle with fingers.

This would be a great way to attract attention in crowds.

Carve a turkey.

I’m more of a turkey hacker, which is a darn shame. A proper turkey slice would be more enjoyable for the family I’m sure.

Tie a bowline.

Bowline? Tie? Nope, this is new to me. If I had to guess, I would say this is a thing to learn for boating.

Give a good massage.

I wouldn’t be single for long if I could put my weak hands to good use.

Get a car unstuck from the snow.

I always seem to get stuck. Knowing how to handle the snow better would be the way to go.

Break pool balls.

I don’t know how to do this the right way, so I usually sink the white ball on the break.

Make logical arguments.

People seem to misunderstand my views sometimes. Having the confidence to back up what I say, and clearly, could go a long way.

Write 7 meaningful letters.

Knowing how to craft handwritten letters to loved ones would help with my communication skills. Tragically, writing by hand is a dying skill these days.

Shoot a gun.

I’ve never been to a gun range before. I’ve never even held a gun before.

Make a toast.

I’ve never done a proper toast. Only speeches. This would be worthwhile for future dinner events.

Jumpstart a car.

I feel like I’d get the reds and blacks mixed up right now.

Learn to dance.

My dancing skills are so awkward that I always shy away from this.

Brew perfect coffee.

I don’t drink coffee, but knowing how to make the perfect brew would be a nice gesture for guests.

Tie a tourniquet.

What is a tourniquet?

Learn two cool uncle tricks.

When I become an uncle, having tricks up my sleeve is a must for entertainment purposes.

Fillet a fish.

Handling a dead fish is completely new to me. That and the fishing part.

Calm a crying baby.

The one who can calm a crying baby at a restaurant is the one. Plain and simple.

Hammer a nail.

It might take me 20 hits before that nail goes in. So embarrassing.

Ride a motorcycle.

I only rode a motorcycle once, as a kid. Perhaps it’s time to actually take the front seat.

Cook a signature dish.

I can do simple meals, but anything extravagant is beyond me.

Make a fire without matches.

Do I have the patience for this? Only one way to find out.

Tell a story.

I can create stories. Can a tell a story off the top of my head? That I need to try.

Those are the 68 skills to learn still! Hope this gives you some ideas to work on as well.

Apple

I was able to overcome my chronic social anxiety after two decades of struggle. Here is a personal story that might give you hope and strength to push through as well.

Kindergarten.

My social anxiety started at the age of five, in Kindergarten. When you start a new journey in your life, it is scary. Elementary school was downright scary for me. My teacher would ask the kids to take part in social discussions, and I would always have an extreme fear to speak up among others.

My report card even said I was shy in discussions. Funny how little we knew about introversion back in 1994. Consequently, my parents didn’t handle the situation because no one understood what was going on.

Except me.

I knew I was different. I knew I didn’t chum around like the other kids. Looking back, I was so consumed by my own flaws that I didn’t even notice other kids were shy too, and it was okay.

You would think that constant exposure to group discussions would help me overcome my social fears, but it only made things worse.

Some discussions required that everyone speak. I dreaded the idea of knowing that the tenth person to speak would have to be me.

9 kids to go…
8 kids to go…

I would start sweating. I would sweat all over. My hands would get clammy. My armpits would drip like a leaky faucet. By the end of the day, I would need a fresh change of underwear after sweating everywhere down there too. And I mean everywhere.

5 kids to go…

I was absolutely terrified to speak. I never told anyone about this problem.

Not once throughout elementary school.
Not once throughout high school.
Not once throughout university.

High school.

In high school, the world fell apart for me socially.

I was afraid to leave the classroom during lunch because I didn’t know who to eat with or what to say if I sat next to someone in the cafeteria.

I would simply dread lunch hour. I didn’t know how to kill 60 minutes. I liked to wander the halls with food in my hands, avoiding any direct eye contact with classmates. Sometimes my friends would ask me to sit with them, and I would.

Quietly.

I was even awkward in conversations with my friends and refrained from saying anything unless asked. Even the words coming out of my mouth wouldn’t be any longer than an incoherent sentence or two.

In my mind, I just didn’t fit in with anyone. I was an outcast, an outsider.

University.

Heading into university, my social anxiety led to depression.

My grades suffered. I was almost kicked out for low performance. I felt miserable.

It certainly didn’t help that my school looked like a prison, constructed mostly of dull grey concrete and sheer lifelessness.

Funny how most schools look like this.

I was at a point of serious isolation in my mind, even while surrounded by other students.

In my fourth year, classes started to rely more heavily on assignments and less on exams. I always liked assignments because I could take time to prepare my thoughts. Exams always stopped me in my tracks.

Near the end of my four-year post-secondary education, I was able to squeak through with mediocre grades.

The real world.

Now it was time to venture into the real world, where supreme social communication and networking are the make-or-break ways to succeed in your career.

Yay.

I suffered for two years. I couldn’t network and I couldn’t communicate with anyone.

Most days I would hide in my bedroom. Everyone thought I was doing my own online marketing business when in reality I was actually doing nothing.

I just needed to disappear completely, just like that song by Radiohead.

After two years, I decided to try to get a job.

Surprisingly, I got a job as a marketing manager within a few months. This was serious business, something that would test my social skills.

People always say I have a great work ethic, and I wanted to perform well in this job after all my isolation. I wanted to do better with this job than I did with university.

At first, I was extremely shy and unwilling to talk with any of my co-workers. After six months, I opened up. I got to know everyone really well. People loved my smile and my kindness. It was a great feeling to finally feel a bit less socially anxious.

I was 25 years old at this point. At this age, I finally felt more relaxed with who I was. I started to accept my situation.

Truth-bomb.

Once you accept your circumstances, you realize that all your focus can be channeled towards the things that matter.

I always felt like I talked funny or I looked weird. As a result, I felt scared to show my flaws.

As I’m getting older, I embrace my weirdness a little bit more each day.

Now if you’re reading this and you’re quite young and you don’t want to wait until age 25 to solve social anxiety, take a look at the truth-bomb I highlighted in bold up there. If you can focus your attention on what matters and accept your situation, you will see a little bit more comfort today compared to yesterday.

Every once in awhile, there are still days when I get clammy hands or drenched undies. Dates with a woman or speaking events are usually the causes now.

The fact that I am telling you these details is an indication that I have accepted the circumstances and I embrace them as my own, with a smile on my face.

Beware the quiet man. For while others speak, he watches. And while others act, he plans. And when they finally rest… he strikes.