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Chapter 8 of the One Life Manifesto: Health.

I would say throughout my life I have been fairly healthy. I don’t do drugs. I’m not into drinking alcohol. My diet is fairly controlled. Like everyone else, I have my cheat days. But I have never been overweight. I have never been obese. I have always been skinny. I mostly thank my high metabolism for that. But you know what? If I wanted to, I could be obese. It could definitely happen. All I need is more sugar, more salt, more unhealthy fats, tons of carbs. That’s what makes up our North American diet. If I eat a lot more crap, then I could be that individual.

But that’s not me. I am psychologically not capable of going down that road of unhealthy eating habits. I want to discuss with you how I have really conditioned myself to live a very healthy life. There are so many benefits to what I am about to describe. You will be much happier, much more focused, with more energy than you have ever felt before. That’s what good health brings you. It brings you a higher level of intelligence, less stress, less anxiety, less bodily issues, less of that need to go to the hospital. Less of that need to go to the doctor. Less of that need to subscribe for medications. I am happy to say I am not on any medications. No medications to rule my life and dictate what I can and cannot do. I feel limitless and that is due to my good health.

It doesn’t take much. I am not the gold standard by any stretch. Actually, I approach a very simple process to ensure that I have a good, healthy life. It’s not over-complicated at all. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. Watch the media and news outlets suggesting you need to try this diet or that diet. Problem is, once you listen to too many voices, you start a new diet every week. Your body doesn’t like the on-and-off inconsistencies. Your body and mind both need to get into a habit of one simple routine.

Think when you go to grocery stores. You find that the majority of foods are filled with sugar. The aisles are covered with high-sodium and high-sugar foods, with the bakery taking up a big portion of the store. They’re calling out to you: I am the sugary treat, eat me. Come and try me out. It’s there every time you go to the grocery store. It’s not easy to turn right and ignore. It’s in the aisles as well. Sprinkled in with the healthy foods.

Right next to the produce area is typically the bakery. It’s almost impossible to go and get your fruits and vegetables without seeing a cake, cookie, or pie in the distance. There is no control on the amount of unhealthy food in the grocery store. There does not seem to be any government control on this. Governments have these health care issues and they wonder why.

We are talking about a 50% obesity rate in countries like Canada and the USA. Maybe that’s why healthcare is not so great. Most people are in hospitals because of a heart attack or cancer caused by the food we eat. Due to unhealthy living and an unhealthy lifestyle. Maybe if the government controlled what kinds of foods were in a grocery store, there would be less of that.

It’s a psychological habit when you see the unhealthy item. You have the desire to pick it up. If it is there in front of you in the grocery store, your brain says: I crave that. You go for it. But if it is out of sight, it is out of mind. You are less likely to fall into the trap. You know I love my cookies. I love my cakes. I love my pies. But I do not eat them every day. It’s not part of my normal routine. My normal eating routine is a specific set of foods. I don’t have a ton of salt, I don’t have a ton of sugar.

Healthy foods require some study. It requires you to be understanding of the foods that are out there and why you need to eat those foods that are healthy. Understand why they are good for you and why they bring you energy. You need to educate yourself if you want to implement this change. The more educated you are, the more disciplined you can be with not eating the unhealthy foods. I know you will have cheat days sometimes. It is important not to feel guilty if you do.

It’s your opportunity to get disciplined. Turn that page. Re-adjust. Your family may be a reason why you don’t eat healthy. Maybe they are the ones who go to the grocery stores and they take charge. They buy the foods. Maybe it’s time for you to take initiative and say: hey! Why don’t you let me take this on for today? I am sure they would appreciate it if you put in some effort and went shopping with them to help them out. Say: hey! Let me get dinner tonight. Bring home a healthy dinner everyone can enjoy.

Don’t let others buy food for you. Perhaps they are putting toxins in your body, moving you closer and closer to hospitalization. That is the harsh reality. If you go down the road of obesity, you will be in need of medical help. Whether it be through medications or sickness, you will need to go to the doctor more. I don’t like going to the doctor. When I do go, it’s hopefully for maintenance. There are never any serious physical issues with me as I eat healthy.

Here is the food-buying process. When I go to the grocery store, I focus on two particular areas: produce and meat. That is it. The other aisles I pay very little attention to. Now I am detached mentally from the other aisles. I do not go down the other aisles. I have a specific set of foods that I have in mind before I go shopping so that I don’t get swayed by temptation. Produce and meats. No frozen meats or foods. Frozen items are just as bad as table salt by itself, filled with preservatives and salt to keep it fresh past the expiry date.

People want convenience. They want fast. They want quick. They want cheap. The perception is that frozen food is cheap and easy to cook. Frozen food sounds good. Can’t go wrong there. Get a pizza, throw it in the oven, and it’s good to go. It’s not the best approach to think of food as convenience. Food is not convenient. Food is a necessity. Food is a big part of your life. Food provides the fuel for functioning throughout the day. You put the right food in your body, your body will work without a hiccup. Put the wrong food in and you will break down. You will fall apart. Your body cannot function the same way. I see all these people who are exhausted by the end of the day.

I have plenty of energy with no caffeine, no lattes, no unhealthy foods. I fill my body with greens. 75% of my plate is greens. Most people don’t even have that many greens, if any. People look at greens as if the taste is just not there. Forget the taste. Move past the idea that food has to be delicious, even though healthy food can be, easily. If food has to taste sugary and salty, move past that thought. Get to the point where you can enjoy the food as it is. I may be an extreme example because I will eat a handful of spinach and enjoy the taste and the texture. I know it is healthy for me, and I feel great afterwards. I enjoy my handful of spinach. Of course, I will encourage you to put olive oil on it to get some healthy fats. Mix healthy vegetables together with a few fried eggs on top and boom, you’ve got yourself a delicious salad. Olive oil is your dressing. You do not need vinaigrettes and ranch dressing full of unhealthy fats. Vinaigrettes are mostly full of salts and sugars. They are disguised as healthy and light salad dressings, yet they are not.

As a rule of thumb, the foods that die a couple of days later are the foods that you should consume. The fruits that wither are the fruits that you should consume. When it comes to meats we jump quickly to talk about the expense. I disagree. I feel that fresh meats are actually less expensive than the usual junk out there. You are cutting away all of the salts and you are getting exactly the food that you need to fill your body. It is like premium gasoline for your sports car. You are going to be running smoother with premium fuel. So, it is worth the investment.

When you break it down, you can get bulk fresh meat, freeze them, and only eat what you need. In fresh meat you get a full dose of that protein, a full dose of whole food that fills you up for hours. Potato chips are astonishingly very popular, but absolutely toxic. There are healthier options these days, but still they are not healthy enough. They are just lighter, which means you will eat more of them. Smaller, which means you will just eat more.

I recommend you transition to snacks that are healthy. Switch over to walnuts, almonds and other unsalted nuts. Perhaps some raisins to get that iron in there. Raisins are a good substitute to sugary foods because they have a healthy, natural sugar. Apples are another alternative to sugary foods. Nice, delicious apples to me are much better than any candy. It has the high fibre that I need to fuel my day. I like having them in the morning for breakfast. These are very basic, simple foods that are absolutely easy to consume. Yet you just pass them in the grocery store like they don’t exist.

I recommend that you review what you are buying at the grocery store. Consider clearing away all the garbage in your household. If you have healthy food in your household, you are more likely to eat healthy. Fill your shelves with healthy foods. If you have a cheat day, that is okay. Embrace it. If you have several in a row, you may wish to review why.

For me I look at the mirror and I say there is no way I could ever be obese. It’s not something that I would want to put myself into. I never want to go to the hospital. If I become obese I will become hospitalized. I would never be able to handle the stresses of life. Plus the horror of the hospital just scares me away. I do not want to go down that road ever. Psychologically, I must eat healthy. I simply cannot eat unhealthy for days. I never want to put myself through that misery.

That is my discussion on food. It is a tough grind to make the adjustment. Your diet is more important than your exercise. 70% of who you are today is due to your diet. Your appearance is dictated by your diet. So, if you get your food in order, you will find life to be a little easier.

You might need somebody to help you out. For me, my brother encouraged me to eat healthier. Although I have always been fairly particular about what I eat, my parents helped by putting vegetables on my plate when growing up. So, I understood what was required to eat a healthy meal. As far as meats are concerned, I don’t eat anything too heavy. I prefer chicken, salmon and turkey. All the lean variety. I don’t deviate too much from that. It is my strategy and I alternate between those three meals. It keeps things interesting. Gives me the variety I need. Satisfies my cravings for food. Once you have your food, nutrition and diet taken care of, you will be more equipped to handle the next piece, which is exercise.

Exercise is not fun for everyone. I don’t always enjoy my routine, but I do it. I know I must do it to keep myself in shape and keep my muscles tuned. So, I have some very small routines that I do every day. I get into yoga every morning to get some flexibility. This keeps me conditioned. I go for some basic walks. All you really need to do is walk around the block every day. I started with that. I try to get a 30-minute walk in every day. You can do it during your lunch break or while you’re at your work, heading to meetings. Ideally you should get it done in the morning, when you wake up. Go for exercise and then you are done for the day. You move on with the rest of your tasks, knowing the hardest part of the day is over with.

If you exercise in the morning, first thing, you will feel amazing for the rest of your day. You will feel like you could conquer the world. It’s a pretty great feeling to have. Why not exercise in the morning? Why not take advantage of the time that you have in the morning? Get up early. Go for a run. Go for that walk. Do something that you enjoy. Dance, stretch. Find an activity you enjoy and embrace it. Do it with somebody else. Get that exercise in. Have sex with your partner, it’s a fun way to burn those calories. For the couples out there it is the most fun way to get your exercise done. Nothing wrong with that. It also shows you love your significant other.

Exercise is that other important piece to ensure that you are healthy, happy and ready to tackle your day. It should be like brushing your teeth. Nobody ever tells you this, but exercise is what brushing your teeth is for the body. It’s required. Nobody ever pushed this 30-minutes-a-day concept when I was young. You just need at least 30 minutes a day to be healthy! But it really is true.

If you just have that routine every day and have it as a process, you are getting something amazing done. By exercising 30 minutes a day, you will live longer, you will live happier. If you are injured, take the day off. You can get back to it. Just like food, you can have cheat days. Don’t plan to have cheat days for skipping or resting, but it could happen and that’s okay. Don’t beat yourself up over it. But just stick to the process of a proper fitness routine. I hope you can make a positive impact in your life to feel good and feel healthy. I want you to feel strong.

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Chapter 7 of the One Life Manifesto: Confidence.

Let’s continue the conversation we had about fear as it ties into confidence. When you overcome fear, you become confident. That is the benefit. Confidence makes you a very powerful person. Confidence is a fantastic trait to be associated with. There is likely something you can think of right now that you are comfortable with. Your fearlessness with that item shows you are confident. That is attractive. Confidence is a very attractive state to be in. I know you cannot be confident in everything. But even if you are confident in one thing, people will take notice. They will realize that you are fearless in that one area. You become a specialist in that one area. Confidence is the result of you tackling your fear. It is the reward.

It’s just a great feeling because you are free from anxiety. You are free from negative emotions. You are aware of the activity and you can tackle it with the ease and effortlessness that others look at in awe. I have never really been one to show confidence. In my subject matter, I think I hesitate and I kind of wean on one side or the other. It’s only been until recently that I started creating content and really taking control of my voice, my views, and my thoughts. Confidence comes with maturity. Confidence comes with understanding who you are. Confidence comes with understanding your capabilities, your strengths, and your weaknesses.

If you spend more time on areas where you can be strong, you will be more confident. You will show the confidence desired. But if you spend your time on areas of known weakness, it may be futile. These weaknesses cannot take you to the level that your strengths can. They are just not your forte. They are not for you. They are not your nature. That is okay. Ignoring the weaknesses shows that you are not focused on what you are weak at. People will begin to notice your strengths more. The strengths will overshadow any weaknesses. You will be perceived positively despite your shortcomings.

Notice how you feel as you continue to work on the things that you are skilled at. Being self-aware of what you can control and what you can improve on is important. Not everyone is destined to be an astronaut. Not everyone is destined to be a musician or an actor. We spend our lives trying to be something that we are not. That makes it very difficult for us to be confident in our true identities.

We can try to be confident in something lacking confidence. Chances are if you are passionate about something and you are determined, you can be confident in that item. But if you waiver, if you are uncertain, you will never have the confidence needed. Find that passion, find that one thing you want to be good at and get confident in it. Break down fears. Master it.

With dating and relationships, your confidence in communication is important. Nowadays you can be confident via text. We have Snapchat, we have images, we have videos. You can exude confidence without words. Nonverbal communication can now be a confident trait in many of the younger generations. Eventually you will have to speak though. It will be important to speak well and carry yourself well. So, I do hope that you don’t let the social media bubble hide you from the importance of face-to-face communication and the ability to talk to people.

In order to be a confident man or woman you need to be confident with the opposite sex. I have talked about this before: it’s about exposing yourself to these fearful events to build up that needed confidence. In psychology, they call it exposure therapy. Where they will put you in a mechanism of continuously being shown something until you are very much comfortable. You become acclimatized to that event.

I recommend you go through your own self-exposure therapy to get confident in the things that matter. Psychologically, that is what is holding you back. The way that you overcome that fear and be confident is to expose yourself to the fear repeatedly, over and over again. Remember the idea of riding a bike, it was fearful. You exposed yourself day-after-day to the training wheels, to the point where you were comfortable with the handlebars. Then you became comfortable with two wheels. You were ready to take off a few wheels to the point where you could ride that two-wheeled bike confidently. It’s repeated exposure. Your parents put you through this at a young age and it’s torture. It’s absolute torture for many of you. For others, you naturally enjoy it. You jump on and say it is exciting.

Constant exposure of something that you don’t enjoy can be very painful. There is however a positive reward at the end of the tunnel. It may be worth it to push through and continue to expose yourself. That exposure therapy is at the heart of breaking your fears. And if you feel that it’s not easy to do alone, I find that the help of others can really accelerate your confidence. They will help you to the point where you will break fears down much quicker and become more confident. I’m lucky to have a family that I can work with daily on this.

Break your fear down into a process. Talk about a fear aloud and say: I am scared of this, I need some help. I need more support to become more confident. I am not sure I can do this alone. It does not hurt to have somebody help you overcome fears, whether it be a mentor or a peer at work. You can build your confidence up quicker when you have a partner. They will hold you accountable. They will ensure that you are on track. Your mentor, your peer, your friend, your family member. They will all keep you on your toes, as they should. It is important to have accountability.

You go through school and education for many years, well over a decade. Many years of continuous learning experiences to absorb knowledge. You can get comfortable with a particular topic as you get into a particular concentration or major. Schools start off exposing you to many different subjects so that you get a taste of what’s out there. Schools are designed to funnel you into a particular area that you excel at. By the time you are 18, 19, or 20, you can decide quite easily what you are good at. If I look at school in that sense, I say it’s great exposure to subjects that you may be interested in. I only wish it showed me more. It does not show you everything.

There are important life skills that you must learn along the way. You must put to practice the knowledge of school. The textbook alone does not build up your confidence. The subject matter and the real world are two very different things. That is why we still deal with tremendous fears when we graduate because we don’t know how to navigate the world. We are still uncertain about what will happen to us. I wish that a year would be mandatory away from school to expose us to the real world and really show what is out there. The trials and tribulations of starting a venture, the process of dealing with failure.

To become confident, you must experience failure. You need to be in love with failure. You need to enjoy the feeling of having failed at something. In school, we were taught that failure is bad. That failure should bring anxiety to you as you strive for excellence with exams and tests. You could be on probation (like I was) or you could be kicked out of school. That’s a negative circumstance. Why would anyone want to fail? Nobody would.

Problem is, you then graduate and failure in the real world trickles into your life. You have no way of knowing how to handle failure as you are still not conditioned. You are not taught to fail when you are young. You are taught to succeed and just be very confident in success, even if it is false. You receive 7th place, 8th place, and 9th place rewards for mediocrity. 7th place doesn’t get you a job. You are built up to be falsely confident in failed endeavours. It astounds me that children don’t understand failure. They are encouraged to brush it off and not learn from the mistakes. Not suffer. Not learn that failure is okay.

By Grade 4, you are given letter grades. If you have an F, you are not coached. You are left behind, you are forgotten. It doesn’t feel good, having failed. The people who have A’s, they will receive more attention. They should. They are confident in their subject matter. However, the people who have failed are likely in the wrong place. They may be confident elsewhere. It should be the teacher’s task to find out where F students can be confident. Promote those activities.

In schools, we are pigeon-holed to do specific classes. There is not much flexibility until university. Even then, the structure is similar to pre-secondary education. Exams take focus. We should have been exposed to exams at a young age – it wasn’t until high school that I took my first exam. We should make exams out to be fearless activities. But we are judged, we are criticized based on exam results.

Hence these enormous fears and anxieties around exams in university. People go into a depression and commit suicide because of the exams. As the date of the exam approaches, people get into a mess. They are in a complete disarray. It’s because they don’t like exams. It’s not something that they can be strong in. For me I had a difficulty in taking exams. I simply was not good at exams regardless of the subject matter. I excelled in project-based work with teams and collaborations. I enjoyed working my ass off to complete a project. That is what I excelled in.

To take a few weeks and study for a very specific type of exam was and is not for me. It may not be for you too. School is based on that. I find that in elementary school, we mostly work on projects. Prevalence of exams is much greater as you get older, even though it’s not necessarily for everyone. I believe it is okay if you work better in other ways.

In the real world it is unlikely you will ever take a single exam. Unless you continue to go to school. Then you will have many. But in the real world, your employer is not going to give you an exam. I suppose it’s a way of figuring out how you handle pressure. I don’t think it’s the way to test aptitude. You are not cognitively conditioned to handle exams. You are set up for failure. You are set to be miserable. Especially when you are waiting to do projects instead and you are craving fun projects. You are craving a specific type of work and your school is not providing that for you. Then how can you enjoy school? How can you be confident in your abilities in school?

As I talked about previously, spending time on your weaknesses may not necessarily be the way to go. Schools only show your weaknesses. It is demoralizing to be going to school when all you do is work on your least-favourite interests. You never get to work on your strengths. Then you are negatively exposing yourself to the wrong things. Positive reinforcement is essential and exposure to the activities that help you grow is imperative. That is what I encourage to build up your confidence.

As you get out of university, you are in control of your level of confidence. You can take on the world however you please. Nobody is there to hold your hand. Mentors are ever more important to keep you accountable. You won’t have any more teachers to babysit you once you finish university. Teachers are gone. So, who do you have to teach you? Who do you have to build your confidence?

It’s up to you to find those people. It’s up to you to find those circumstances where you can continue to break your fears. People who are headed into their 50’s, 60’s and 70’s have this fear. Fear of life. They never experienced what they could have. I look at them and I say to myself: that is an individual filled with regrets. Regret for not having done something sooner. They are living in the fear of the unknown.

I don’t want you to grow up and be one of those people. I want you to be confident and fearless. I want you to feel excited about some endeavour. Confident in your work. Passionate. Living a fearful life is no life to live. So, I hope that you break down barriers and get confident. Struggle through. The pain is worth it to receive that reward. Confidence to become that better person is important.

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Chapter 6 of the One Life Manifesto: Fear.

Let’s talk about fear. Fear is something I have dealt with my entire life. It was ingrained in me at a young age. As a child you are told you should not do something. You should not stick your hand in the electrical outlet. You should not talk to strangers. You should not cross the roads without looking both ways. We are taught about fear at a very young age. We are actually very fearless as children because we don’t not know any better yet. Fear is in the process of being taught to us still. Our parents condition us to be fearful, as they are only protecting us. Protecting us from the elements, the dangers. We have to accept that our parents love us and care for us. They are well-intentioned.

As you grow up, ideally you understand the fears that present themselves. These fears may be something that is really scary or something that you can overcome. It may be something very trivial that you can overcome. However, every individual is different in terms of tolerance of fear-based activities. Some activities are more intimidating to a person compared to others, even if it is the exact same activity. Whether it be public speaking or asking someone out, the varying degrees to which we fear something is based on how we have conditioned ourselves. How we have exposed ourselves to these fears over the many years.

The thing about fear is that it is usually brought about by something in our heads and our thoughts. Our thoughts are saying: no, that’s uncomfortable. You shouldn’t do that. Therefore, we do not. We are uncomfortable towards the uncertain. Some have many fears and others have few. It’s how you experience the world and how you go about experiencing new adventures. That will help you break away from the fear.

As you mature and you grow older you begin to understand that the fears are these immature thoughts. They are just these ideas in your head. You understand that the worst that could happen is actually quite trivial. Or you may not be thinking in terms of “I wonder what the worst is that could happen.” That may be something to think about when you are presented with a fearful objective. What is the worst that could happen for you? Talking to that girl, what is the worst that could happen? Is my fear justified? Is the “talking to a stranger” mentality necessary as I am older and wiser and more intelligent? Are these fears rational or have we just dug ourselves into a hole?

Some of you may be at the point where you cannot even leave your house, scared of the outside world. I believe that social media and our consumption of online materials is a way to escape from our real fears. When you think about it, you will go and get a newspaper to learn about the news. Well now you can get it online. The act of getting information is so much easier. It’s right at your fingertips. You do not even have to talk to a cashier today. You can ring the items through with the self-serve checkout. Even human interactions which you have exposed yourself to constantly are now unnecessary. But when the time comes and you do need to interact, you have not conditioned yourself to handle it. It becomes a fearful event for you to socialize at networking events. Although local events are still out there, they are not as common. You can do everything online with a webinar and just passively watch somebody talking about a topic.

Our lives have actually gotten easier as the tools that are being developed. Apps and all of today’s technologies have allowed us to facilitate our daily lives. Some of it is okay. For instance, some of you may have the fear of driving cars. With autonomous cars you won’t have to worry about that fear. In ten to twenty years, forget about having a license. It won’t be important. It’ll be taken care of.

There are still activities that you will need to do. You will need to interact with people in order to secure a job. You will need to interact with people in order to build a business. If you are injured, you will need to interact with your doctor. Human interaction is still very much present, although less necessary. You use your phones to communicate via text. Rarely do you see people talking on their phones anymore. That was the original method phones were used for: verbal communication.

Definitely these tools have made our lives easier. Yet I do feel that perhaps we are more fearful when we are told that the tools are not present and we need to cope without them. It may be very uncomfortable. What if an Internet crash affected the world’s ability to function? The fear brought about by dependency is a scary thought.

Fear of public speaking is an indication of our inability to communicate. Most of us may have that struggle today. I also feel that if we use the tools to our advantage we can break down fears. People can now publish YouTube videos online. They were afraid of being in front of the camera before. They can get comfortable in front of the camera. It’s not something they would normally do. They can do it with just their phones. It’s easier than ever to put themselves out there and break down the fears. You can even just record your voice and publish it. It just depends on how you look at fear and how you handle fear. Whether you let fear knock you down or whether you let fear challenge you and let fear help you grow.

Growing up, I was very fearful of quite a few things. Fearful of women, fearful of talking to people, fearful of being successful, fearful of so many different, uncomfortable ideas. And then in my mid-twenties I realised that if I feel uncomfortable, that is a good feeling to have. If I feel challenged, that is a good feeling. And if I feel too comfortable for too long, that is not a good feeling. It’s an indication of how much I am exposing myself to fear.

You want to put yourself out there to a point where you are fearing something every day. You should be breaking down that fear and trying to overcome it. By doing so, you will condition yourself to be stronger and better able to battle those fears as they come up. Being uncomfortable is a good thing. I think we just need to put ourselves into a state of discomfort more often.

One of my greater fears today is travel. It makes me uncomfortable and yet I do want to experience new cultures. My plan is to book a solo travel experience to really push me outside of my boundaries of what I think I am capable of. This would really help me overcome the fear of travel.

If you are like me and you had bad travel experiences, that has built up the fear over time. So, you have negative experiences and it only accumulates the amount of fear. The next time you are thinking about it, the fear becomes greater. It is important to understand that past history does not dictate the future and that negative circumstances can become positive.

I struggle with it right now. My next travel experience may or may not be negative. Historically I have only been through negative experiences. However, it may be better as I have matured and grown older. I have now accepted the brilliance behind travel and the experiences that I would enjoy. So, I encourage you to look past the negative experiences and not let that dictate your decision to experience.

However, I would not encourage you to stick your hands in the electrical outlet as that is a forever-negative outcome. I don’t see a positive benefit to that. But there are some positive situations and you can look around and see others enjoying those activities. If you don’t feel comfortable about doing those activities, consider why you are associating negativity to those activities when others are enjoying them.

I see quite a few passionate people who enjoy public speaking. They did not start out like that. They had a fear, just like you and I. But they kept at it. They kept exposing themselves to the fear to overcome it. Remember that whichever insecurity you have, it can be overcome.

There are many people in your place dealing with the exact same situation. They ask the question: what is the worst that can happen if I follow through with this? You should consider asking yourself the same question: what is the worst that could happen? The worst is likely very minor. If you are thinking that the worst is death, you may likely be overreacting. You may wish to re-consider the outcome, unless you are in the middle of jumping off a bridge. Then obviously that is a negative, permanent outcome. There is no positivity to that.

I am referring to positive activities that bring joy to others. If you look at these activities, you can really show a positive energy around others. Find that thing you can break your fear of. Fear can really cripple our livelihood and prevent us from really seeing, experiencing, and doing in life. Fear prevents us from starting that project that we always wanted to.

Fear can be very irrational. And we have a response to it. When we fear something we have anxiety. Anxiety is this feeling that we get when we fear something. It’s this unease. And we don’t like the feeling. That is why we do not put ourselves into an anxious state. Because it is uncomfortable.

When people tell me that they have anxiety, I doubt they have it all of the time. That means they are constantly in a state of fear. That is no way to live. I would accept anxiety. Anxiety is a very good feeling. I am anxious when I am just about to public speak, yet I absolutely welcome the feeling. Even if I am sweating profusely I know that this is building me up to be stronger. I now accept the feeling. Being anxious is a good feeling. It means that you are putting yourself out there. You are getting into uncomfortable situations. Breaking down barriers. Fear and anxiety is a part of life. We can’t approach everything in the world and be fearless. It’s actually not possible, humanly or biologically. Hey! This is something new, this is something foreign. You are bound to have even a little bit of anxiety here.

Some choose not to talk about it. But it’s okay. If you are anxious, it’s good that you are. That’s how you overcome fears. Try to put yourself out there. That is important to try these fearful things. Do not give up. Then you will see that your fears can be overcome.

I believe that fear will always be present in one’s life. Fears can be controlled and not be controlling. They do not have to control what you do. It is important that they do not control you. They are a side-note. Just like anxiety is a side-note. You are aware that it is present and you appreciate that. You nod your head and say: thank you for letting me know. I will continue. I will push through. It is critical as I have battled the anxiety and the fear my entire life. I will continue to do so. I am more accepting of it now.

I now get to the stage where I am not fearful if someone is judging me. Everyone is too busy thinking about themselves, and their judgement only lasts briefly. They don’t have time to think about whether you will make a mistake or not. It’s irrelevant. The next day, you won’t even be remembered. It’s good to think about it that way, even though it may be a negative approach. The fact is, people will forget about you. So, you have nothing to lose. And if you can be in that state and accept being forgotten, then any task can be fearless. Because only you will remember it.

I realize that social media has a lasting effect. It appears to make things permanent. Nothing has to ever be permanent. You can always remove things if you need to. Posts. Accounts. Photos. There’s always a way to remove blemishes. Chances are people are not looking at that photo, thinking: oh, what a disaster that was. They are moving onto the next thing. There is too much to consume. There is too much new stuff every day to be paying attention to you all the time. You are forgotten and you are drowned in the feed of other news.

Knowing that nobody cares is actually an interesting way to get over the fear. More likely than not, you will have people supporting you, encouraging you, and being positive for you. Not criticizing your work. Ignore the bullies who treat you otherwise. Go up there and do public speaking. Go up there and do something extremely difficult. People will admire you because they know it is a fearful task. Once accomplished, you will feel relieved and accomplished. A big boulder will be lifted from your chest. People will admire you because you inspired them. If you can do it, others will feel like they can do it too. It is important to let people know that fear is not the ruler. Fear is a side-note. Don’t let fear run your life.