Trev

Apple

This collection of thoughts about my life at the age of 29 is dedicated to every lost twentysomething millennial in the world.

I am lost at 29.
I have a million ideas.
I want to make a difference.
I don’t know where to start.
I don’t know why I wait.
Time ticks by.
Life passes by.
Life is hard growing up.
Some days I am happy.
Other days I am sad.
I don’t know where to start.
Join me in this poetic collection of thoughts about life.

Travel.
I have visited two countries.
Canada.
America.
I am afraid of the world beyond.
Is it scary?
Is it kind?
What if someone says hello?
What if someone says goodbye?
What if?

Red.
I love red.
I love love.

Sight.
We have two eyes.
We use them every day.
Be grateful for your sight.
It might be gone, one day it might.

Analysis paralysis.
Some people take two hours to write a sentence.
Some people take two years to start a business.
Some people take two decades to marry the one they love.
Some people take two lifetimes to get it right.
But we only have one.
Our thoughts guide us.
Our thoughts hold us back.

What my gravestone says.
What would you write on your gravestone?
I would write my life mission.
I would write about the legacy I left on the world.
Maybe we should all get writing now.
Before it’s too late.
And the gravestone says less than desired.

Failure.
I f*ck up often.
For years I thought that was a bad thing.
But it is the only way to find yourself.
I still don’t know what I’m doing.
I still f*ck up often.
Failure is the only option.

Affairs.
Don’t do them.
Get out of them.
This can be a bad addiction if you let it.
Affairs will take you to bad places.

The atheist.
They can be negative.
But they work hard.
And they have goals.

The agnostic.
I am not anything.
I am not an expert.
I don’t know where I was.
I don’t know where I’ll be.
Let’s have conversations backed by reality.

Dogs.
They appear cute and cuddly.
They love to play.
Then one jumped on me.
I was 6.
I’ve been afraid ever since.

Fights.
It’s usually about nothing.
We love each other.
But then your emotions get the best of you.
Always apologize sincerely.
If it happens often, figure out why.
There’s no fun in fighting.

Being millennial.
We’re lazy.
Crazy.
Disloyal.
Caught in turmoil.
We don’t know what to do.
So we brew an avocado stew.
We are millennials.

Green smoothie.
Spinach.
Broccoli.
Hemp seeds.
Flaxseed.
Protein powder.
Coconut oil.
Celery.
Blend 10 secs.
Frozen fruit.
Cucumber.
Salt.
Avocado.
Blend 10 secs.
Then until smooth.
The green smoothie.

My bed.
Warm.
Inviting.
Comfy.
I never want to leave my bed.
If I could, I’d stay there forever.
And rot day by day.

How to make money online.
Trade something of value in exchange for money.
Find out what you can give that’s valuable.
You might have to give and give to discover the answer.

Business scams.
If it’s too good to be true, you know what to do.

Escape.
We want to escape our world.
We think there is life outside our own.
This is your life.
Don’t be a prisoner.
Live.

Retire at 35.
We want to relax at 35 these days.
We go through mountains of stress to get there.
Find what you love to do instead.
And you’ll never need to retire for the rest of your life.

Millennial words.
Snunch = snack for lunch.
Woke = trendy.
Extra = drama.
What inventions are you creating today?

Idols.
We need people to look up to.
This is missing from our lives.

Guilt.
Don’t let the past hold you back.
Learn from it and move on.
Guilt is a bad feeling that does no one good.
Move towards present and future innocence.

Wasting time.
We sit in front of our screens for hours.
We wonder why the time goes by.
And nothing gets done.
Every moment wasted is a moment we’ll never have back.
Count down how many days, months year you have left.
Then decide if wasting time is your mission in life.

60 more years to live.
I have 60 more years to live, if I’m fortunate.
Is this what I want to be doing in 60 years?
Whenever the answer is no, I think about what I need to do.
Because I want to live these next 60 years.

Old man dying on train.
Every day, on my commute, I see plenty of people.
There is one man – he is dying.
Unmarried, fatherless, friendless.
His life is work and commuting.
He appears miserable, sad and depressed.
Imagine if he stopped going on the train.
And you saw the old man doing what he loves.
We could reverse many frowns by living life that way.
Do what you can to avoid being that old man dying on the train.

Artists.
The struggle is there as an artist.
If we persevere, the world will appreciate our efforts.
We must work hard and continue to share our story with the world.
All we need is one fan.
That one fan can turn into 100.
100 fans can turn into 1,000.
If we let others tell us how things should be done,
Our art will never be what it could.
Keep sharing your art – someone will find you.
Someone will become a fan.

Manhood.
What does a man look like?
Is he strong?
Is he supportive?
Is he kind?
I do not know.

Meet Scary Girl.
She likes to bully other boys.
Other boys have done everything they can to make Scary Girl happy.
Roses. Chocolates.
Handmade cards.
Everything.
Not a single gift would make scary girl happy.
No one knew why scary girl acted this way.
Some say she was bitten by a werewolf.
Or a vampire.
Or that’s just the way she is.
Her hair looks like dangerous snakes.

The bus man.
There was a bus man.
He made his passengers happy.
He would say hello and how are you.
To everyone.
Everyone take note of the bus man.

Weird.
I put peanut butter on salads.
I like skipping breakfast.
I sleep on my side.
I wear thick glasses.
I am skinny.
I am tall.
I like silence.
I look different from the rest.
I avoid conversation.
I like playgrounds.
I use coupons.
I am weird.

Girlfriend.
My life is better in every way.
She makes me laugh every day.
When you find someone who loves you.
Love them too.
And hope they stay.

Startup life.
Here’s what I learned after four months in a startup.
It’s just like corporate, but faster.
Weeks equal corporate months.
Staff turnover is high.
Half the team won’t handle it and move on.
Me included.

Rock-bottom.
Left my job due to stress. Then my girlfriend left me. Outside of my family, I have no more friends. I’m 29 and feel like this is rock-bottom. I seek no sympathy – this is just where I am. What I do next has to be better than what I’ve done up to now. It’s time for me to become a man. I’ve started to see a therapist to address my deepest, darkest issues. I have bold ambitions to change my life around. Goodbye rock-bottom.

I’m at home when I’m with you.
There was this girl, on the playground.
I was drawn by her lovely sound.
Her smile, her lips.
And her fingertips.
Thinking…I’m at home when I’m with you.
I’m at a point in life where I want a wife.
A wife who loves me.
And wants to be around me.
Thinking…I’m at home when I’m with you.
Who I can lighten up in her darkest hours.
And make me smile while I’m gone awhile.
I’m at home when I’m with you.
I’m at home when I’m with you.

Parents who talk a lot.
Let them talk.
One day you will wake without them.
To guide you.
To help you grow.
Love parents who talk a lot.

9 to 5.
8 hours of doing what you hate.
Day in.
Day out.
What would you do if you had 8 hours to live?
Likely not the 9 to 5.
Do what makes you live.

Suicide.
Imagine all the people who love you.
Everyone who ever said hello to you.
All the lessons you’ve learned.
The potential you have in this world.
Then stop.
Just stop.
You have more chapters to write.

Waking early.
Waking up early is not fun.
All groggy.
All sad for another day.
Unless you know what you want in this world.
Then you jump out of bed…
Find out what you want.
Or keep searching.
Wake early for that.

Improv.
The laughter.
The fun.
The friends.
The carelessness.
The spontaneity.
The surprises.
Try improv.

Comfort zone.
Ignore it.
Break it.
Expand it.

Discipline.
I want cookies.
I want cupcakes.
I want donuts.
I want ice cream.
I want milkshakes.
I want brownies.
I want churros.
I really want to see my children grow up.
I really want to grow old with my wife.
I want. I want. I want.

Life at 29.
There is life still.
So many years to go.
You’re just getting started.
There is still a life to grow.

Apple

The artist may never become successful without first knowing the business of art. There is a journey to be taken before creative pursuits come to fruition. I am taking this journey now and thought I would share with you my learnings thus far. I am continuing to learn every day, and hope these experiences can help you.

Struggle.

I first want to give you a story about struggle. That really is the business of art. Most hide away to avoid real struggle. You should know about the pending struggle and prepare for it. Schools, corporations and institutions do not prepare you for what I’m about to share. I know this because I was once in school, and they never taught me what I was supposed to learn in my field at the time.

Life happens. Remember this. Two years ago I almost lost all of my eyesight. This was just after taking a risk by leaving my secure corporate marketing job. I had grand ambitions as an entrepreneur, but I wasn’t sure if it would be possible. Luckily I recovered some of my eyesight. This may have motivated me to start creating children’s books, anything to escape the typical career path. I certainly didn’t want to waste away doing nothing.

Less than two years later I wrote, illustrated and independently published 50 children’s books. That was something to me, to figure out how to do all of that. Problem is, I only had a few sales to my name and no real following. I was unknown, and I doubted myself.

To this day, I’m still not really known in the children’s book world. I have dealt with self-doubt and anxiety at every stage. This is my struggle, and I spend my days trying to figure out the business of art. Even though I’m unknown, I think it’s important that I share this current journey with you, as it’s in progress.

You always hear stories of success, but struggle is appealing too. Struggle is a reality. This is why Lord of the Rings is so popular. Two little people, willing to tackle a seemingly impossible feat. The journey to creativity is most perilous and noble (I sound a bit ancient there), and there is no better path to take.

Depression.

Artists and entrepreneurs have a shared challenge of fighting depression. Dr. Seuss battled it. Edgar Allan Poe battled it. When pursuing something meaningful, there can be a torrential downpour in our minds when we least expect it. We are the proverbial bosses of our of creative empires, and we may not have adequate mental capacity to carry out our dreams in isolation. This results in a downward spiral towards substance abuse, addictions, isolation, depression and potentially suicide.

I’m not saying all of this to scare you. The reality is, the things you really want in life are hard to get, and you have to be mentally strong to get them. Make sure you handle your limiting beliefs. I proactively went to a therapist and coach to ensure I could handle anything that gets thrown my way. If you’re dealing with troubling thoughts, support of any kind would be wise.

Art.

You have a pile of messy crap that you need to swim through before your art becomes acceptable to you. I’m paraphrasing what author J.K. Rowling had said in a speech. Once you have the confidence in your art, your mess becomes more defined. More you. Masterpieces will become easier to produce as you build the habit of daily production.

Even during the struggles, it is important to continue making art, no matter the quality of output. Most times our struggles bring out the best in us. After the art is finished in your mind, it should never be touched or edited again. The art now belongs to the world, and it is now time to get working on the next piece.

Value.

Go get what you’re worth. Don’t look at people in the Philippines or India and think you have to compete on price with them. This is especially true for graphic designers who decide to compete on logo contests or freelance projects. Stick to what you think you’re worth and charge for it.

How do you know what that value is? Write down what you think it is right now. Can you ask for that number confidently? Great. Maybe raise it a little more until you reach that fine line of confidence and anxiety with your price. Too many artists undervalue their work and just give it away for free. Free is unattractive. Real customers of yours will pay for your unique value.

Marketing.

Art is very entrepreneurial. You need to be promoting yourself endlessly, especially now that traditional publishers and galleries are pickier than ever. I reached out to hundreds of promoters, expecting them to do all the marketing for me. The reality is, you have to be the best marketer on your team. And that means you have to approach this like a business empire, a publishing platform.

Prospective customers are waiting for you to grab their attention. This is where artists fail. We simply lack the confidence or choose the wrong marketing channel to get the word out there. If you are introverted like me, maybe you can explore social media or prepare an opinion piece like this. I doubt high-pressure sales would work for us introverts, or most authors for that matter. Look at mastering a channel or two, but not too much more. Stay focused on the art, and it will begin to market itself.

You may have heard about Kevin Keller’s 1,000 fans to build your art business – make $40 a year off these thousand people and you have a sustainable income. But maybe that’s just an average goal for average people. My goal is to hit $30,000 per month because it’s a scary enough goal that I have to stretch myself further to figure it out. Getting to $40K puts you with everyone else, and anything less puts you with nonexistent artists, with paintings being sold at a discount on Craigslist.

Scale.

You can digitize your work. You can create merchandise online. You can grow a YouTube channel. Think about 5-7 income streams for your art, just like you would think about diversifying your investment portfolio. This allows you to scale your work for the long-term and build a viable business. Here are five revenue streams to consider now, with no up-front costs:

Art itself. You should be charging reasonably for your product (remember your value). This is your main income stream to start.

Affiliate sales. If you sell your art or books on Amazon, check out the Associates program. This gives you an additional commission on any sales coming from your website. Easy to set up and helps with long-term income as you become more and more popular. Many platforms out there, but obviously Amazon is the major player.

YouTube ads/sponsors. I have a YouTube channel where I do narrations of my books and vlogging of the process. Once this grows significantly enough, I can monetize it by running ads or asking for sponsors in my niche to support me in exchange for a mention. As you get more and more views and a following, you can make this a viable option. Find a simple niche aligned with your art style and start filming today with your smartphone.

Courses. You can do a how-to course and sell it on Udemy. “How to draw a cat” or some other unique topic might net you some cash if you have that inner-teacher in you.

Merch. Take your art and create variations of it in the form of merchandise. T-shirts are an option. Or quirky stickers. The options are endless. In terms of popularity, Redbubble is one platform to check out for this. Or Merch by Amazon.

There are many more ideas, like workshops, coaching and consulting, and it makes sense to choose the ones that align with your interests.

By thinking about how you will scale your artistic endeavors, it becomes more than a hobby or boutique passion. That’s what you want, so this can work for you in the many years to come.

Discipline.

I wake up at 5am every day to go swimming first thing in the morning. Countless authors and artists have structured routines to ensure they are in a tip-top mental state. Stephen King has to write 2,000 words per day before he watches a Boston Red Sox game.

When you’re as isolated as most authors, being mentally sharp is a necessity for becoming successful. You sit down and look at that blank canvas for hours if you have to. Don’t get caught up in what appears on that blank white page or screen or canvas. Something is better than nothing. I use a template to ensure my creative start is as easy as possible. Momentum works wonders for production.

Flow.

To continue, there is this make-believe thing called writer’s block. It’s essentially another term for being lazy. There is no barrier in front of you. The boss expects the TPS report to be on his desk by Sunday. Do you think writer’s block exists in the corporate world? Nope. And same goes for art. You need to set up situations where you are always in a state of creative flow. Lock at the proverbial blocks and determine why you are mentally putting them there.

For me, my set template that I start with for all of my children’s books helps with that mental block. The best thing is, I’ve already written three outlined pages before even starting! These little aids disguised as motivations are what will help you move forward every time you sit down before the daunting task of creating. Once you are in a consistent flow, art will appear effortlessly.

What other stresses are getting in the way of your creative flow? Walk through them in your head or on paper and come up with solutions to move past them.

Successes.

You need to celebrate when things are going well. Self-care is important. Take the time to recognize your successes so that you can maintain that forward momentum. Stay humble and grateful while recognizing these silver linings.

I like to celebrate my accomplishments with treats or fun hikes. Unwinding after a success will prepare yourself for the next one. Take a breath and enjoy these moments.

Mondays.

Are your Mondays great? They better be. You can’t be creating if a job is getting in the way or if you feel like doing nothing at the start of the week. By the time you hit Friday, all you will want to do is party or watch movie marathons. Map out what your Monday should look like and pursue it as reality. Your creativity depends on your ability to feel stress-free and positive every week.

Commenters.

A.K.A. “The Haters”. People who get in the way of your desired path. These are social media trolls and anyone who is jealous of you and your pursuits. Commenters, both positive and negative, can put you on an emotional roller coaster. It’s just plain stressful.

I’m personally terrible with receiving feedback. As a result, I will limit the amount of time I accept comments, to the point of using few social media channels. Most artists are impacted this way. Any critiques, reviews or suggestions can hinder your progress. Only accept feedback when you are mentally prepared for it. And don’t listen to what everyone says, they’re not you.

Story.

I buy a Basquiat because of the backstory. I buy a Banksy because of the backstory. I buy a Van Gogh because of the backstory. What is your story? What makes your art interesting is the journey, not the finished product. Your journey should be visible in the product you create. Find out what your story is. That story will drive you to create more.

You can call it your mission, your passion, your pursuit – anything. It’s the thing that drives you to create every day. If your answer is money, you might be blinded by greed. The business of art ironically starts with how you are making an impact in the world, not how you are making money. Some artists aim to enrich the lives of others. Others aim to share fun stories with the world. Define what all of this is for you, and constantly remind yourself of the why behind your pursuit.

This is the business of art.

Apple

The percentage of us with no close friends has tripled since 1985.

Millennials like myself are the most common variable in this equation.

Ironically, the Internet, an invention that should be bringing us together, has become the main reason for spreading worldwide loneliness since its debut. We are continuing to isolate ourselves by hiding behind the computer screen.

The risk of death increases by 26% among lonely people. Kids are becoming more socially anxious, starting at a much younger age, as parents accept iPad use during toddlerhood (Dictionary.com says this is a word, I like the sound of it). Kids are hiding behind screens and avoiding real social challenges and responsibility.

When you sit in that coffee shop or walk through that shopping mall, your view of the people around you might be different than what it was just fifteen years ago, pre-Facebook, pre-social feeds. You might notice a little more loneliness everywhere you go.

One thing that sparked my interest in the topic of loneliness was the ever-increasing emptiness of cul de sacs on Saturdays. I grew up in a cul-de-sac (1990’s-2000’s), and you would see kids outside everywhere, rain or shine. Now? No one.

I play basketball outside with my brothers every week. We’re all grown-ass men in our thirties (okay, I’m 29, but let’s round it up). The things us Carss brothers see are empty fields and empty courts on weekends. Occasionally, one boy or girl might be shooting hoops by themselves because the parents wanted some alone time (they couldn’t find a babysitter when the romantic moment struck). The reality is, that child has no one to play with – the rest of the kids are at home on iPhones, sending around Snapchat filters without any real emotion or empathy.

Some highly influential marketing experts and gurus suggest that social media is making kids more connected than ever before, but I’d go on a limb and say Psychology Today and Harvard Medical School would be more reputable sources than these people (this is where I’m pulling my statistical data, but I’m not going to academically add citations because I still get nightmares about APA format).

We are facing a global health epidemic without a real solution in sight at this present time. The Internet is such a new invention that we haven’t really learned about its long-term health effects. And social media is just a baby in comparison – we really don’t know what we’re dealing with here…as I write this article…alone in my apartment…on a website of all places.

Businesses are becoming more dependent upon online marketing strategies and social media to grow their bottom lines, and rightfully so. This is where consumers are at. This is where more and more business is being done. We need Instagram experts to understand consumer psychology more than ever before. Or do we? How many people are actually happy who look happy on Instagram?

Industries are changing. Even the book publishing industry is evolving now. Selling paperback books has transitioned to selling eBooks, which has transitioned to selling audiobooks, which has transitioned to an increase in noise-isolating bluetooth headphone sales (key word: isolating). As someone selling children’s books and audio narrations, I should eat my words. Even I am encouraging kids to read on iPads by releasing these stories. I’m even narrating them on YouTube in an auto-playing playlist (endless hours of content to drive your kids nuts). Seems paradoxical to be doing all of that after writing an article knocking iPads and the Internet, but I need to make a living, and that’s where the parents are.

I’m not intentionally writing an article to create doom-and-gloom. Not by any stretch :/ This is more of an awareness and mindfulness play. Sometimes we just don’t know we’re spending time on harmful things. I like to create what might make at least one person uncomfortable. That’s where the content becomes meaningful.

If I had kids, I always subconsciously believed that giving them a phone would be dangerous. Now I’m beginning to feel like my hypothesis is becoming a reality.

I don’t want to be an armchair expert or any expert for that matter. But given the trends these past two decades…

I probably wouldn’t allow devices at the dinner table.

I probably wouldn’t allow devices until they move out.

I probably would encourage playdates with real friends.

I probably would have fun and play outside with my kids.

…I hope we all do someday.